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Aussies put the touch on Hutt, NQ won't stand for it



The Royal Family of Hutt River Province (HRP) have been ordered to pay a total of around three million Australian dollars in back payments to the Australian Tax Office.

Mayor of Mareeba, 'Big' Tom Gilmore has travelled to Parliament House in Townsville to express his disgust at the decision.

He was recognised as an official speaker by the Primo Secretario del Senado and addressed the representatives of both houses for over an hour.

Following is an expurgated extract of Gilmore's speech:

"We and Australia have a special relationship. I love that word 'relationship'. Covers all manner of sins, doesn't it? I fear that this has become a bad relationship. A relationship based on Australia taking exactly what they want and casually ignoring all those things that really matter to North Queensland. We may be a small country but we're a great one, too. The country of Matty Bowen, Aubrey Patterson, Julian Assange, Karl Stefanovic. JT's right foot. JT's left foot, come to that. And a friend who bullies our friends is no longer a friend. And Hutt River Province is our very good friend. Since bullies only respond to strength, from now onward, we must be prepared to be much stronger. And those Aussie wankers should be prepared for that."

Councillor Gilmore received a standing ovation following his speech. In response, the Minister of Defence, Dame Lisbeth Trickett, advised that seventeen North Queensland troops were enroute to HRP as a show of strength.

Prince Graeme took to twitter to express his thanks:

"Pleased to welcome NQ heroes to our little nation. BYO Quetza boys!!"

North Queensland and Yemen are the only two nations to recognise HRP as a sovereign state.

In other news, Cowboys were beaten by shifty Storm in dodgy golden point result.

#Politics #News

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